my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
