I love black thongs
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
