I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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