And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Bring me that man meat
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.