the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
