Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
