i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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