We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
