After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize