Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
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It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
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