Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
