if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
thus making me awesome and them whores
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
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