Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize
