I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize