I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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