Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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