I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
