I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
bring money and cleavage
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
