remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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