Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
