I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize