she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
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just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
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I still have a little drunk in my system
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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