just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
sex in a hospital.. check
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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