my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
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