What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
she smelled like a LAN party
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize