Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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