Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I just had sex on a roof
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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