I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
