your parents love me but you hate me
I smell stomach acid.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I'm at about main and main street
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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