You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
