what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize