i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
