Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
