we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
