I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
