sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
