That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize