I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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