are you so shy because you have an std?
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
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