You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
where are my eyebrows?
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize