I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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