i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
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he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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