Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
