apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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