Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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