i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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