Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
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