We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
