Porn is love you can see.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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