Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
