"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Randomize