In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
